So when someone is saying negative stuff about someone else (it doesn’t matter they’re talking about a celebrity, politician, a colleague, a friend, or family member), what does it mean if it feels bad to you to hear this negative stuff about them?

Here are a few possible ideas of why hearing criticism about others feels bad:

1.) Bad feeling means you’re going DOWN the emotional scale
It means you want things that feel good and are aware that this negativity is lower on the emotional scale than you are naturally, and so it doesn’t feel like relief, it feels bad. It means that negativity is a step away from Well-Being from where you are right now.

2.) Bad feeling could mean non-alignment with higher truth
It could mean that the words don’t resonate as true with your higher self, and the words feel “not right” because perhaps they aren’t entirely right. Perhaps the behaviour of that person that is being judged is not a 100% true representation of who that person really is.

3.) Bad feeling could mean non-alignment with what you want
It means the negative words are resisting something that you want. Perhaps what you want is to think well of the person (even if the negative points they are accused of are also fair and true). Perhaps what you want is to give the person a fair chance (even if they turn out to be guilty as charged in the end). The facts almost don’t matter; all that matters is what YOU want.

Here’s an example of this point #3:
In some cases the negative observations may be true, but you may not be ready to see them. Perhaps you’re in a type of denial about it and don’t want to see the negativity. This has been the case in the past in some reality shows like The Bachelor. I remember one story where the guy, Ben was warned by the other girls in the house who were competing for his hand, that his favorite girl (Courtney) was trouble (and she was judging by her behaviour that was filmed for the show), but Ben didn’t want to hear. What he wanted was to believe that she was right for him, because she was attractive and seemed sweet and he was attracted to her. He was focused on her positive aspects which were aligned with what he wanted; so hearing the negativity about her which wasn’t in line with what he wanted made him feel bad.
As Abraham say: “As you are deliberately looking for positive aspects in yourself or in others, you will find more of those things: The better it gets, the better it gets.”
In the end he chose to ignore all warnings, went with what he wanted, and picked her as his final choice as “the one” for him. Was he right to ignore the warnings? Well, in the end he saw that she wasn’t right for him and that the warnings about her were true.
According to the law of attraction, Ben saw the best in Courtney, and attracted only positive experiences with her initially as a result, even though other people around her manifested a different experience with her because they had different expectations of her.
So if Ben manifested the best version of Courtney that was aligned with what he wanted, why did they split up eventually? I can only speculate, but perhaps it was due to his belief in Courtney starting to waver and uncertainty about her creeping in as they spent more time together or as the noise from the public’s negative opinion of her became more dominant in his vibration. Accordingly to his change in certainty, she showed a different side of herself to match his wavering opinions of her, and eventually they split up.

If all is hunky dory and your life is flowing along well, you will feel good and not necessarily notice that something is missing in your life. But if, on the other hand you are not experiencing such good things in your life and you don’t have what you want and you’re feeling disenchanted and allowing these things to colour your life’s quality, then you may be feeling out of control. You may feel as if life is just happening to you and that you don’t have a clue as to what you can do to change things so that they can feel consistently better.

You may have tried to take action and hope for the best, and sometimes it worked but sometimes it didn’t. At times when the action you took worked, it may not have lasted very long in changing circumstances and how you feel. When you take action from a place of spiritual misalignment with your Inner Being, the action inevitably will not be very effective. There needs to be an alignment within yourself with the action you seek to take in order for it to work out as you wish. So here you are, wondering why life feels so difficult sometimes……

The reason life feels difficult at times, is that many people are not familiar that they are only partially aware of how the Universe or life works. Not many of us have been taught about our spiritual side which ironically is the most significant part of who we are. It therefore makes complete sense that when you leave out the larger part of who- you- really- are you’re not going to feel whole.

So here’s how it works: We are eternal souls living in a physical body and this soul part is the spiritual part of us that functions vibrationally. In fact the whole Universe functions vibrationally meaning that everything has a vibrational frequency. Everything we see, hear, touch, smell and taste are all vibrational translations of our senses’ perceptions. These frequencies determine how our life feels at any given moment and the range is very wide. The good news is that there are ways we can get to control our frequencies and create our own lives. We have the power to give ourselves anything we desire.

So how do we do this? Step 1 is to become aware. Once you know that you are vibrationally oriented, here are more of the secrets to give yourself a happy life. The Law of Attraction is the most powerful and consistently inclusive Law of the Universe that manages everything that happens. It is inclusive because it works vibrationally and not morally. It doesn’t give you brownie points if you are good or bad points if you err. There is no judgment involved. All that determines the quality of your life are your thoughts and how you feel about them now. Your thoughts carry vibrational frequencies and you always have the power to change them if you are willing to do so. The Teachings of Abraham*(*as channelled by Esther Hicks) tell us that our emotions are our reliable Guidance System and by this they mean that the way we feel is an accurate, second-by-second gauge that indicates to us whether we’re on track or have gone off-piste.

In addition, because the Law of Attraction manages everything that comes to you for better or for worse, this happens because people inadvertently focus on the lack of what they want instead of what they want. So what is meant by this? You might wonder why some people win the lottery and why others don’t……the secret to this is their focus and alignment with their desire. If you feel poor, miserable, frustrated, sick, angry, resentful, jealous, tired, etc. any form of negative feeling, your vibrational frequency does not match that of a winner of a lottery. You are focused on the lack side of the story, the losing side, not the winning side. Your frequency is on negative radio channel MW 103 and the winner’s radio channel is on the AM 94 channel, two completely different frequencies. If you try to justify your wretchedness by saying that a lottery win could solve all your problems and that you are more deserving than anyone else for reasons you find, you continue to be focused on the lack or absence of what you want. The lottery win can never match your vibrations if you are in this negative-feeling mode.

So how can you change your vibrations to match up with those that make you a winner and allow you to feel good? Your focus needs to be on things that make you feel good, that make you feel like a winner even before the actual lottery win comes to you. It is a process of being conscious and guiding your thoughts step-by-step over time until you consistently feel good: You feel appreciation, you look for things deliberately that make you feel good. You give your attention to things, people and events that are positive and inspiring. You seek out uplifting things. You focus on opportunities and don’t bring problems into your radar. Even if negative things happen to you, and inevitably they do, how you handle them, is what is important: You can look at a setback as a problem, or it can be an opportunity for learning something new.

Focus on a problem is a very different vibration to focus on a solution. Wanting the lottery win and not having the lottery money are two completely different vibrational frequencies. The trick is to feel okay despite not having what you want manifested in reality. You can be in a situation, say have a physical condition you don’t want and be in a state of despair or fear, or you can be sick and be in a place of hope and optimism. You have the ability to direct your thoughts in any way you choose. And how you feel at any moment in time shows you if you’re positively focused to feel good or negatively focused to feel bad. If you feel good, continue thinking in this way to feel better and better. The better it gets, the better it’ll be.

If, on the other hand you’re not feeling so hot, it means you Guidance System is working perfectly in indicating to you that you can feel better by changing your thoughts to more positive-feeling ones.

Once you are vibrationally aligned in the region of what you want, it then can come to you with ease. It is easy because you don’t have to know how or when it’ll come. This is the job of the Law of Attraction. Your part is to get up to speed and align with your thoughts and how you feel about what you’re asking for, and the Law of Attraction brings it to you. Ask and it’ll be given when you relax and allow it to come to you.

You can’t control conditions. You can’t control world events, the weather, other people, things that go on in your environment or even in your family home. Your point of power is aligning your thoughts and consequently how you feel about what you’re thinking to good-feeling ones on as consistent a basis as is possible. Get the positive-feeling-momentum going and no matter what happens in your world, you’ll always experience it in a positive way. If you are problem oriented, you’ll attract problems to you. If you’re solution oriented, you’ll find the answers flowing your way. It’s all vibrational and Law of Attraction always, consistently delivers to us the experiences where we have the most momentum flowing, be they positive or negative. What determines what comes to us, is the strength of the vibration, the power of the force of our feelings.

When we are aligned with our spiritual self, our Soul or our Inner Being we feel happy, we feel joyous, we love and we appreciate. We have the knowledge of life at our fingertips, we have clarity of mind and we are filled with energy and a zest for life. This, Abraham calls “being in the Vortex”. When you reach this vibrational alignment, your responses to life feel very different to when you are far removed from who-you-truly-are. Even when so-called problems come into your reality, you won’t experience them as such. Your vibrational setpoint will be on a level of alignment with you Inner Being and from here, you can handle anything. Life is meant to be good. We are here for the purpose of experiencing a good, happy life in freedom and joy. The aim of our life is to grow as an eternal soul and this is something that continues forever.

The Law of Attraction governs everything: Like unto itself is drawn. You get whatever you most focus on, for better or for worse. If you focus your thoughts on positive things, your life will be filled with positive things. If you focus on negative things, Law of Attraction will give you negative experiences. Law of Attraction does not differentiate between real or imagined things. Your personal energetic vibrations determine the quality of your life. So if you are imagining the ideal experience and consistently feel really good about it until you just feel and know and expect that what you’re imagining is inevitable despite having no proof of it in reality, Law of Attraction will deliver what you’re dreaming about.

On the other hand, if you really want something and keep noticing that you don’t have it, or that you deserve it more than others; are envious perhaps of those who have what you want; you are unwittingly keeping what you want away from reaching you. The vibration of these negative thoughts and feelings are very different to the vibrations of feeling positive about expecting what you want to materialise. If you focus on all the negative things happening in your life, you’ll feel miserable. Focusing on all you don’t want only brings you more of what you don’t want.

If you want to feel good, you have the choice to distract yourself from all the negative things in your life, and make a concerted and deliberate effort to focus on positive things. Giving your attention to positive things will then allow you to attract positive feelings and positive life experiences. You can have or create the life of your dreams. It’s all about being aware of how you are feeling about what you’re thinking now.

Because how you feel now is all that matters, this is what you want to achieve: to always feel as good as you can in the present moment. The present moment is what colours your experience now and what determines the quality of your life’s canvas.

Trying to Control People Close to Us: Parents have been brought up to believe that it is their responsibility and duty to be in charge of and control their children’s lives. With all good intention, they believe that as they are senior in age and have lived more of life, they know what’s best for their children. They therefore control their children’s lives as much as possible in many cases, with the idea of giving their children the best chances in life.

Why then do children often not feel so good when their doting parents are doing the best for them? The answer is that the parents are really doing what’s best for THEMSELVES so that THEY feel good. Parents are separate from their children and can never truly know how their child feels or thinks. They can assume or guess, but they cannot ever live in the mind and heart of their children. They therefore cannot truly know what’s really best for their child. Each person can only experience life according to their own perspective and unique life experience. Therefore, without being aware of their true motivation to control their children’s lives, they erroneously believe that they know what’s best for their children and subsequently mould them into a certain way of life that they judge is appropriate.

Each person came to earth as an eternal soul in a physical body to experience the great contrast of life in freedom and joy, with the main purpose of expanding and growing. We are vibrational beings living in a vibrational Universe where everything is dependent on how we feel about what we think now, and what vibrational frequency we are on.

We were born with an internal guidance system that is 100% accurate all the time in how it gauges the quality of our life experience. Our emotions are this internal guidance system as the Teachings of Abraham tell us as brought to us through Esther Hicks. When we feel good, our lives are on track and when we feel bad, we’ve swerved off the track. Our thoughts are always under our personal control because we have the ability to change them at any stage. It helps to become aware of how the Laws of the Universe work and once we appreciate and understand this, we can create our own lives and give ourselves the life we desire.

Law of Attraction is the manager of everything that happens in the Universe. It functions vibrationally, meaning that it picks up the significant vibrational frequency from you and brings more things of the same vibration to you. It is an inclusive Law, so it does not differentiate between good and bad, real or imagined. It just delivers things to you that match up with your vibration now. Now is the only relevant time, because how you are feeling and vibrating now determines how your life is panning out now, and also in the near future.

Every subject is 2 subjects: things you want and the absence of the things you want. Many people don’t realise they’re giving their attention to the absence of what they want instead of what they want. So if you’re thinking of how controlling someone in your life is, and you feel any kind of negative emotion like being victimised, powerless, frustrated, angry, etc. you’re focused on the absence of what you want while you’re observing the situation as it is that you don’t want. Even justifying how wretched you are and how deserving you are of a better life, you still are focused on the absence of what you want. Whenever you feel bad, no matter to what degree, whether it is mere frustration or full-blown hate or anger, you are focused on the negative side of the equation of what you desire. When you are vibrating in such negativity and bad feeling, the Law of Attraction brings more of these situations to you. You can never feel good or attract better-feeling things, people or experiences to yourself while you are feeling so bad. The Law of Attraction always is consistent: it matches up things that are of the same vibration.

The reason we so dislike being controlled by other people, is because we were born understanding that freedom is the basis of our lives. Being forcibly restricted and controlled by others therefore goes against our soul’s purpose of desiring to live a life where we feel free to be ourselves and make our own choices.

If you find yourself in a relationship now where you are feeling controlled by another person, be it your parents, your partner, your boyfriend/girlfriend, your boss, friend, mother-in-law or anyone else, the most effective way you can empower yourself again is to change your thinking and how you feel about your thoughts. It also is the easiest and quickest way to get positive results because of our vibrational nature and that of our Universe. The reason why people struggle in life is because they leave out the spiritual component of how our lives function. Once this is acknowledged and you learn to use the Laws of the Universe to your advantage, life becomes good. You regain full control of your life and your freedom and you create the life you want.

So how do you do this?

1) Become aware of how you’re thinking and how your thoughts are making you feel now.

2) If your thoughts make you feel good, then continue thinking positively and you will feel better and better.

3) If you’re not feeling good, change your thoughts to anything that feels slightly better. If you are feeling despair, for example, or feeling sorry for yourself, you can’t jump from here to thinking about something that makes you jump for joy. The gap is too big to jump from despair to joy. You can move yourself slowly, step-by-step, to feeling more positive. Be patient and kind to yourself.

4) To help yourself feel better and raise your vibration, appreciate the small things that are positive in your life. They can be as small as the sun shining or your pet’s beautiful soft fur, etc. The longer you focus on things (anything) that make(s) you feel good you raise your vibration slowly but surely, and strengthen yourself. You begin to regain your feeling of personal power again merely by the focus of your thoughts as they make you feel better and better.

5) If you are able to, you can focus on the best parts of the person who’s controlling you, and only give your attention to these positive aspects of them. Remember and think of them as you love them and appreciate them. Isolate these best aspects of them that make you feel good as you think about them.

6) If you can consistently concentrate on these people as you love them while completely ignoring their controlling parts, Law of Attraction will only bring you together with these people as you positively think of them now. Their controlling, negative parts will not be a part of your reality any longer and if they continue to try to control you, because you have changed how you visualise your relationship with them now, and you feel good now, it won’t affect you. Either their controlling behaviour with you will stop, or they will cease being a part of your life because you will now be on a different vibrational frequency. A controlling person cannot control a person who is unwilling to be controlled and who is in their power enjoying their freedom of choice. Control and freedom are on two different vibrational frequencies.

7) If you can’t manage thinking of the best aspects of this controlling person, then distract yourself with any thoughts that allow you to feel better. Always notice how you’re feeling at any moment in time because how you feel now is what your life will feel like now and also possibly in the future.

8) Make a conscious effort to notice the good in people, places and things.

9) Only talk about things that make you feel good and remove yourself from people or situations where you feel bad.

10) Listen to uplifting and inspiring music and words. Take note of what and who you’re surrounding yourself with. Ensure you feel good at all times.

11) Watch TV and movies that engender good feelings.

12) Law of Attraction will always deliver to you the vibrational equivalent of how you’re feeling now. You have the power to change your thoughts at all times so have the ability to feel good whenever you want to.

13) You are the creator of your own life and are born with all the internal resources inside you to live a life of freedom and happiness.

So why do most people tend to decline with age? People give many popular reasons for this, like lifestyle choices, nutrition, a hard life, etc. And while these factors may contribute somewhat to a person’s deterioration, the main reason is that we have been thinking and feeling negatively during much of our life without taking the time to deliberately change how we feel. We have not been aware of the power of how our thoughts and feelings determine our quality of life.

We have the most astounding ability at our fingertips to give ourselves a happy and healthy life simply by becoming aware of how we think and how we are feeling about what we are thinking. You cannot be happy and sad at the same time. You cannot be happy and lonely at the same time. You can’t be happy and feel sorry for yourself at the same time. You can’t be happy and sick at the same time…..and if you are sick and happy, you won’t be sick for long. A happy, positive, person is a healthy person. Good health is a state of mind to a very large degree.

We can’t control what our society thinks, but we, as individuals, can change our own personal thoughts. We can think differently to what most people think if it serves us best and we can decide to expect different things that benefit us too.

As we move through time, we cannot stay young and our bodies undergo changes. We can remain in our prime however without having to decline despite our moving through time. We can do this effectively by paying attention to our thought processes and how we feel at any given moment. How you feel in the present moment always determines how your life feels now. Whether you are thinking of something from the past, the present or the future, how you are feeling about it now is what is relevant.

Many people live contrary to their own well-being because of their unawareness of their habits of negative thought patterns. When people feel negative emotion over a long period of time, they are unwittingly contributing to their general decline step by step. They may have been focusing on things they don’t like or don’t want and these types of things can’t ever contribute to happiness or good health or well-being. You can’t give your attention to something that feels bad and expect to feel good. The Law of Attraction is one of the most powerfully consistent and inclusive Laws of the Universe, which always matches us up with things that are the same: Like is matched up with Like. Because it is an inclusive Law, this means that you will attract to yourself whatever you are most focusing on whether it is something you want or something you want and don’t yet have or even something you don’t want, because Like unto itself is drawn. This Law of the Universe does not distinguish between good and bad. It just delivers everything we give our attention to the most and feel most strongly about.

We all have the power to change our thoughts and change our lives to be happy and healthy. Most people want well-being; to feel free, to be strong and full of energy and enthusiasm for life, to be happy and healthy. When people observe what is present in their bodies, their life, their family, their environment, their world and see things they don’t want that they feel bad about, they are, without knowing it, adding to their own decline. When you observe what is and you don’t like what you witness, see, hear, speak about or feel, the Law of Attraction can only bring you more of the same experiences unless you begin focusing on things you want that make you feel better. We are all responsible for how our lives pan out. We cannot blame anyone else because no-one can think our thoughts or feel our feelings for us and create our reality for us.

Our happiness and good health is actually an emotional journey: when you feel good, you are on track for a life of well-being. Every moment that you focus on things that you like, that make you feel positive, that make you feel happy; thinking of things, places or people that you appreciate and love; giving your attention to such things contribute and assure for you a happy, healthy life.

If you are physically not well the more you talk of various aspects of the ill-health, the longer you will remain ill. This is how the Law of Attraction works: Like will attract like.  Deliberately make the effort to distract your thoughts from the reality of the physical conditions you don’t want. Stop talking about doctors and medication, statistics and tests. Stop talking about and noticing things around you that you don’t like or don’t want. Instead give your attention to what you want that makes you feel better and better. You can be sick with a negative attitude or you can be sick with a positive attitude. If you can get yourself to focus on incrementally feeling better and better until you reach a place of hope, you will find your quality of life greatly improved.

Many people fear death because they do not have the knowledge or trust that they are eternal beings. Becoming ill and declining slowly is a way that people postpone the process of ending their lives in their physical body. They get themselves into a state of perpetual negative thinking and feeling, with little let-up, and this state hastens their deterioration even more. Any fear-filled or negative thought contributes to decline: bearing grudges, feeling injustices, worrying, remembering unpleasant experiences, feeling envious, hating, being embarrassed, feeling guilty, etc. All play a part in our decline to one degree or another.

The way to move gracefully and positively through time is concentrating on the things you love, enjoy and feel good about. Appreciate things. Look for reasons to feel good. Always do your best to focus on what you want that you feel good about. Notice how you’re feeling and if you don’t feel good, change what you’re thinking about because that will be the source of why you’re not happy now. Make this your mantra from the Teachings of Abraham for a happy and healthy life of well-being:

I INTEND to feel good,

I WANT to feel good,

I EXPECT to feel good,

No matter where I am,

What  I’m doing,

Who I’m with

Or what I’m saying…….

When you allow, you feel relaxed and you accept who you are and accept and allow others to be who they are. The act of allowing or accepting feels good. You feel free because you don’t create conditions or experiences you don’t approve of or don’t want. You can only ever feel truly free when you are free of any negative emotions.

When you tolerate however, there are degrees of negative emotion you feel depending upon what you are tolerating and how it makes you feel. Tolerance is conditional acceptance while allowing is unconditional acceptance. When you tolerate, you create standards of behaviour for yourself that you feel you have to live up to in order to let others do what they choose, even if you really disapprove of what they’re doing. There is therefore a tug-of-war feeling going on inside you of observing something you really disapprove of that makes you feel negative motion but having to grin and bear it. Your tolerating can feel good to the person whose actions you are tolerating because you don’t actively hinder or interfere with their behaviours or actions.

But the negative feelings you create inside yourself when you tolerate are not to your advantage at all. You might feel sorry for the person, fearful for them or yourself if they take the action you don’t approve of, yet watch them do it anyway. And when you feel any form of negative emotion, the Law of Attraction will deliver to you more things that you disapprove of and don’t want and don’t feel good about.

Allowing then is what will bring you a feeling of true freedom and when you feel free you are connected to who you really are and can live and let live in joy.

1) Be aware of your thoughts and how you feel now. We always have the power to focus our thoughts and change them if necessary. In addition, our emotions are our very reliable guidance system that clearly indicates to us how we feel.

2) If you don’t feel good, change what you’re thinking about. Focus only on what you want and check that you feel good.

3) If you’re not feeling good, you’re probably focused on NOT HAVING what you want, so refocus on something that feels better.

4) How you feel NOW is what is most important. Whether you are focused on the past or the future, you’re thinking about it now, so let it feel good.

5) How we feel now, in the present moment determines whether we are happy or not, and will or won’t pre-pave our future as we desire it to be. So ensure you feel good as often as possible. A person who feels good and is happy, is inevitably a healthy person. They also get what they want in life.

6) The way the Law of Attraction works, is that things of a similar nature are drawn to each other. Like will attract like. Whether you’re focused on something positive or something negative, you will attract whatever you are giving your attention to. The Law of Attraction is an inclusive Law and this means you get what you most focus on, be it positive or negative.

7) Many people think they are positively focused when actually they are negatively focused. Everything has two sides: 1) things you want and 2) things you don’t yet have but want. The Law of Attraction is 100% consistent and will always deliver what you are most focused on and feeling the most strongly about.

8) If you think about not feeling happy and wish you were happy, you’re drawing more unhappiness to yourself because you’re focused on what you don’t yet have. Thinking like this does not feel good and when you don’t feel good, the message your emotions is giving you is that you’re not on the right track to happiness yet.

If, however you feel happy about what you’re thinking and want more things to feel happier, you are then attracting more happiness to you. The positive feeling feedback from your emotions indicates that you’re on the right track to continue feeling happy.

9) Look for the best qualities, the good and the beauty in all people, places and things.

10) Make feeling good your priority in life. Make your mantra a positive one: to strive to feel happy no matter where you are, what you’re doing or who you’re talking with. When you feel good, you’ll attract positive experiences into your life.

11) Focus on the best aspects and qualities of yourself. Expand on them and appreciate them and yourself.

12) Surround yourself with people you love and who are positive and happy.

13) Go to places you enjoy that make you feel happy.

14) Speak of things that make you feel good. If they don’t, change the subject or remove yourself from the situation. Make a point of not discussing problems and issues that don’t feel good.

15) Be discerning about what you listen to and watch on the radio, on TV and generally in life. You can’t feel good if you listen to bad news, sad music or angry rants. Choose uplifting and inspiring things to tune in to that make you feel good.

16) Go out of your way to appreciate things just for the sake of feeling good when you think about them. This helps raise your vibration. Appreciation and love are very close in vibration and will engender good feeling, happiness and joy.

17) Life is meant to feel happy and because you are the creator of your own reality, you have the power to give yourself the happy life you desire. Appreciate who you are just because you exist. There is no-one in the world exactly like you. You are totally unique.

18) You were born to experience a happy and joyous life, to feel free and to experience a life of great variety and contrast that would help you grow and expand. These are the purposes of your life. You can be, do, or have anything you wish.

19) Follow your own gut feelings/intuition or instincts. Trust yourself. Other people can’t feel what you feel or think as you do. They can’t know what’s good for you. Don’t ask them because they can only give you feedback from their own perspective. Their viewpoint may have no bearing on how you really feel and can only be appropriate as they perceive you and not necessarily as you really are.

20) Always reach for the next-best-feeling thing you can manage. If you’re depressed, it’s a quantum leap to expect yourself to be happy in a flash, so work your way up, bit by bit to things that feel better.

21) Be kind and loving to yourself. Be easy on yourself. Talk positively to yourself.

22) If you have a physical condition that you don’t want, look for the moments when you do feel better, however slight they may be. You can be sick and have a positive attitude or you can be sick and have a negative attitude. Notice how you’re focused and do the best you can to be as positive as you can. Being sick and hopeful is better than being sick and being in despair or in fear or feeling sorry for yourself.

23) All negative emotions can be seen as messengers that tell you you’ve gone off track and can now refocus your thoughts to those that feel better. Our emotions always are reliable indicators as to where we’re focused. The good thing also is that we have the ability to choose to change our thoughts at any time.

24) You have all you need within you and are powerful creators of your own reality. You can give yourself the life you want at any time and the Law of Attraction will always be there to assist you. Just check you’re focused on what you want that feels good as you think it.

Pleasing everyone all the time is in fact, impossible and we’re just setting ourselves up for failure. The reason that we’re unable to carry out the task of being all things to all people all of the time, is that we are trying to control the uncontrollable: We’re attempting to control other people’s perception of us, and this is not possible. We cannot behave in enough different ways that will allow all people to approve of us as we take action to please them and gain their approval and love.

Each person has their own character and life experiences that have helped them reach the point they are at as they perceive you. They each have a vibrational set-point from which they see you which came into being as a result of their living their own life. All was their own creation and had nothing to do with you because no-one can create in another person’s reality. Therefore, even though you feel responsible to make someone feel better by gaining their approval with your actions, it actually is not under your control at all. The way others feel, is the way they feel because of who they are and their own personal emotional responses to things.

What you receive from someone who is asking you to do things to make them feel better, is a reflection of their own feelings that have been caused by the life experiences they’ve had that have nothing to do with you. You are not the reason why people feel bad. It therefore is not your job to please them so they’ll feel better.

Most people are not aligned with their Inner Being and from such a position of vibrational misalignment and negative feeling they try to control conditions (and you) to make themselves feel good. The Law of Attraction is a very consistent Law of the Universe that always delivers to us things that correspond with how we’re feeling now and where we’re at now. It’s impossible to feel good from a place of feeling bad. No-one can imbue another person with good feeling when they are not on that vibration. Like things will attract like things. It’s like trying to tune in to a different radio channel and expecting to receive this new transmission when the one you’re on is on a different channel and frequency. It’s just not possible.

So trying to please a person who is out of whack to begin with will not consistently make you feel better, make them feel better, let you gain their approval or change your life (or theirs). When you attempt this impossible project, and you inevitably fail, you can lose your feelings of self-worth and self-confidence and feel inadequate. Trying to gain the approval of others who are not aligned is looking for love and acceptance in the wrong place.

The most powerful way to feel your own worthiness is to align yourself with your Inner Being and feel the love for yourself coming from within you. The idea is to always take care of yourself first and get your own good-feeling vibration into gear rather than trying to please others to feel good.  You cannot give anyone anything valuable from a place of lack and inadequacy. You can only give out what you already have and if you are catering to someone from a position of inadequacy and expecting them to make you feel worthy with their approval, you are not going to achieve what you want. You can only feel worthy unconditionally once you feel of value from within and love and appreciate yourself for just being you, and not because of the things you do that please others.

Living conditionally means expecting or wanting others to behave in certain ways to please us. Most people live conditionally because they respond or react to what they see happening around them. They then try change circumstances to feel better sometimes asking you to change the way you behave to accommodate them in some way. Desiring to please, you may attempt to do what you believe will gain their approval. Everything that a person feels is always their own personal responsibility because only they can feel what they feel because of who they are.

We can allow ourselves to feel free when we let go of trying to control how others perceive us. What you think may please someone may not be in line with what they think is pleasing. It’s often a guessing game of hit-and-miss. Doing one thing that you believe is good and will gain the approval of someone may or may not be what they want depending on their mood or frame of mind. There is no way we can ever second-guess or control another person’s feelings or perceptions.

All we can do is the internal vibrational work to change how we feel personally from within. You cannot expect to feel good from a person you feel needs pleasing because they don’t feel good. This is contrary to how the Law of Attraction works with similar things being matched up with more of the same. So when we feel good ourselves and don’t rely on others to make us feel good, worthy, accepted or loved only then will we truly feel free and be ourselves.