Free yourself from controlling relationships

We live in a world that is filled with a great variety and contrast of people, places, experiences and things, etc. and trying to control everything is nigh on impossible. Why do we try control things in the first place? The answer is I think is quite simple: so that we’ll feel good. But controlling all conditions all the time is impossible. There just are too many.

Trying to Control People Close to Us: Parents have been brought up to believe that it is their responsibility and duty to be in charge of and control their children’s lives. With all good intention, they believe that as they are senior in age and have lived more of life, they know what’s best for their children. They therefore control their children’s lives as much as possible in many cases, with the idea of giving their children the best chances in life.

Why then do children often not feel so good when their doting parents are doing the best for them? The answer is that the parents are really doing what’s best for THEMSELVES so that THEY feel good. Parents are separate from their children and can never truly know how their child feels or thinks. They can assume or guess, but they cannot ever live in the mind and heart of their children. They therefore cannot truly know what’s really best for their child. Each person can only experience life according to their own perspective and unique life experience. Therefore, without being aware of their true motivation to control their children’s lives, they erroneously believe that they know what’s best for their children and subsequently mould them into a certain way of life that they judge is appropriate.

Each person came to earth as an eternal soul in a physical body to experience the great contrast of life in freedom and joy, with the main purpose of expanding and growing. We are vibrational beings living in a vibrational Universe where everything is dependent on how we feel about what we think now, and what vibrational frequency we are on.

We were born with an internal guidance system that is 100% accurate all the time in how it gauges the quality of our life experience. Our emotions are this internal guidance system as the Teachings of Abraham tell us as brought to us through Esther Hicks. When we feel good, our lives are on track and when we feel bad, we’ve swerved off the track. Our thoughts are always under our personal control because we have the ability to change them at any stage. It helps to become aware of how the Laws of the Universe work and once we appreciate and understand this, we can create our own lives and give ourselves the life we desire.

Law of Attraction is the manager of everything that happens in the Universe. It functions vibrationally, meaning that it picks up the significant vibrational frequency from you and brings more things of the same vibration to you. It is an inclusive Law, so it does not differentiate between good and bad, real or imagined. It just delivers things to you that match up with your vibration now. Now is the only relevant time, because how you are feeling and vibrating now determines how your life is panning out now, and also in the near future.

Every subject is 2 subjects: things you want and the absence of the things you want. Many people don’t realise they’re giving their attention to the absence of what they want instead of what they want. So if you’re thinking of how controlling someone in your life is, and you feel any kind of negative emotion like being victimised, powerless, frustrated, angry, etc. you’re focused on the absence of what you want while you’re observing the situation as it is that you don’t want. Even justifying how wretched you are and how deserving you are of a better life, you still are focused on the absence of what you want. Whenever you feel bad, no matter to what degree, whether it is mere frustration or full-blown hate or anger, you are focused on the negative side of the equation of what you desire. When you are vibrating in such negativity and bad feeling, the Law of Attraction brings more of these situations to you. You can never feel good or attract better-feeling things, people or experiences to yourself while you are feeling so bad. The Law of Attraction always is consistent: it matches up things that are of the same vibration.

The reason we so dislike being controlled by other people, is because we were born understanding that freedom is the basis of our lives. Being forcibly restricted and controlled by others therefore goes against our soul’s purpose of desiring to live a life where we feel free to be ourselves and make our own choices.

If you find yourself in a relationship now where you are feeling controlled by another person, be it your parents, your partner, your boyfriend/girlfriend, your boss, friend, mother-in-law or anyone else, the most effective way you can empower yourself again is to change your thinking and how you feel about your thoughts. It also is the easiest and quickest way to get positive results because of our vibrational nature and that of our Universe. The reason why people struggle in life is because they leave out the spiritual component of how our lives function. Once this is acknowledged and you learn to use the Laws of the Universe to your advantage, life becomes good. You regain full control of your life and your freedom and you create the life you want.

So how do you do this?

1) Become aware of how you’re thinking and how your thoughts are making you feel now.

2) If your thoughts make you feel good, then continue thinking positively and you will feel better and better.

3) If you’re not feeling good, change your thoughts to anything that feels slightly better. If you are feeling despair, for example, or feeling sorry for yourself, you can’t jump from here to thinking about something that makes you jump for joy. The gap is too big to jump from despair to joy. You can move yourself slowly, step-by-step, to feeling more positive. Be patient and kind to yourself.

4) To help yourself feel better and raise your vibration, appreciate the small things that are positive in your life. They can be as small as the sun shining or your pet’s beautiful soft fur, etc. The longer you focus on things (anything) that make(s) you feel good you raise your vibration slowly but surely, and strengthen yourself. You begin to regain your feeling of personal power again merely by the focus of your thoughts as they make you feel better and better.

5) If you are able to, you can focus on the best parts of the person who’s controlling you, and only give your attention to these positive aspects of them. Remember and think of them as you love them and appreciate them. Isolate these best aspects of them that make you feel good as you think about them.

6) If you can consistently concentrate on these people as you love them while completely ignoring their controlling parts, Law of Attraction will only bring you together with these people as you positively think of them now. Their controlling, negative parts will not be a part of your reality any longer and if they continue to try to control you, because you have changed how you visualise your relationship with them now, and you feel good now, it won’t affect you. Either their controlling behaviour with you will stop, or they will cease being a part of your life because you will now be on a different vibrational frequency. A controlling person cannot control a person who is unwilling to be controlled and who is in their power enjoying their freedom of choice. Control and freedom are on two different vibrational frequencies.

7) If you can’t manage thinking of the best aspects of this controlling person, then distract yourself with any thoughts that allow you to feel better. Always notice how you’re feeling at any moment in time because how you feel now is what your life will feel like now and also possibly in the future.

8) Make a conscious effort to notice the good in people, places and things.

9) Only talk about things that make you feel good and remove yourself from people or situations where you feel bad.

10) Listen to uplifting and inspiring music and words. Take note of what and who you’re surrounding yourself with. Ensure you feel good at all times.

11) Watch TV and movies that engender good feelings.

12) Law of Attraction will always deliver to you the vibrational equivalent of how you’re feeling now. You have the power to change your thoughts at all times so have the ability to feel good whenever you want to.

13) You are the creator of your own life and are born with all the internal resources inside you to live a life of freedom and happiness.

This entry was posted in Life Improvement, Personal Development and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Comments are closed.